Pumpkin Spice: it's not all nice

Blaise Runyon, News Editor and Delaney Warner, Student Life Editor

The following story was written by a student on the staff of The Jaguar Times as part of Hilliard Bradley High School’s Journalism Production course.

The difference in both taste and color between the most expensive coffee, Starbucks and cheapest coffee, McDonald’s, was very noticeable. Photo by Blaise Runyon.

The weather is cooling off in Ohio, and many students will be fueled with coffee as midterms approach. As Instagram feeds are filled with tiny pumpkins, infinity scarves, and Ugg boots, now is the perfect time to find the latte that embodies the autumn spirit. We, Blaise Runyon (12) and Delaney Warner (11), chose to sacrifice our stomachs and wallets for you, our valued Jag Times reader. We went and sampled five options for pumpkin spice coffee local to downtown Hilliard. The lineup consisted of lattes from McDonald’s, Starbucks, Panera, Speedway, and New Grounds. Pumpkin spice lattes have been a staple of autumn since we were in middle school, so there’s no two girls more equipped to take on this task.

McDonald’s decisively delivered a pumpkin taste. The drink was thick with syrup and had a large buildup in the bottom of the cup that no amount of stirring could fully disperse. It also lacked any sort of coffee flavor, which is necessary to make a quality pumpkin spice latte. Runyon best describes the flavor through a series of choice words that cannot be listed in this article, “tastes like syrup- tastes like syrup,” is all we can use. Afterwards Runyon adds, “it made my stomach hurt.” McDonald’s failed to make us feel like we were truly in the autumn season with the overly sugary drink. There are three words in the name of the drink, but McDonald’s only really delivered on the pumpkin.

Starbucks managed to settle us down after the Golden Arches’ disaster. When the drink entered our car, it immediately brought a comforting pumpkin scent to the air. The drink managed to infuse the pumpkin flavor into the coffee, complementing, but not overpowering the drink. The latte was beautifully presented with whipped cream and cinnamon on top. Warner stated, “it tastes like nutmeg.” However, Starbucks was not perfect, Runyon believes the drink, “smells like Christmas more than Thanksgiving.” The overwhelming sweetness doesn’t correspond to the savory tastes of thanksgiving.

Panera had absolutely zero good attributes except for that it was given to us for free (shoutout to the great Panera employee for supporting The Jag Times!). To be completely honest, it was reminiscent of the Cinnamon Challenge popular on YouTube in the early 2010s. The dangerous trend which has gained popularity a few times in the past 15 years is known for blocking airways. Accidental inhalation of cinnamon can cause significant damage to the lungs. Panera could stand to learn the art of subtlety with its flavors. We didn’t spend our money on this drink and you shouldn’t either.

Speedway’s attempt at a pumpkin spice latte was, at the very least, an attempt. It tasted like a child scraping all of the guts out of the gourd to have it torn away from their tiny hands, only to fill the pumpkin up with hot cheap coffee and stick a tap in the side. It was inexpensive at least, surely if it were 4am and there was no other option, it would’ve hit the spot. Unfortunately for the Speedway corporation, it was 6pm and our standards are high.

We did take a trip to New Grounds, but unfortunately for us we’re really bad at ordering coffee. We left with a latte with 3 pumps of pumpkin syrup. It's our own fault; it’s really not fair to compare it.

The time has come. After an evening of consuming way too many pumpkin flavored calories the choice couldn't be more clear. Starbucks has the best pumpkin spice latte in Hilliard. From the taste, presentation, and smell, it truly outperforms competitors in all arenas. Don’t waste your money elsewhere, spend it on the best.